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My life, my entire life was right in front of me. So vivid and so real, I swear I could see it pass like a film reel. The parents who ignored me half my life. My sexuality being vastly different from the others guys at school. The relationship which had brought me more happiness and more pain then I could ever have imagined possible.
Why did everything have to be so hard?
I began shiviering; something which the hot water covering my naked body certainly didn’t attribute to.
How was I supposed to love when no one had ever shown me what it was like to be loved?
My head collapsed into my knees.
He had shown me love though.
Tears fell heavily from my eyes, mixing with the shower water.
A New Year
As a new year of school began, I can say with a fair bit of honesty that I didn’t want to go back. It’s not as if I hated the school itself, it’s just that it seemed like a lot of effort getting up at seven in the morning, eating breakfast, walking to school and then dealing with the people once I got there. I had been doing it for 13 years and even though this would be my last year of high school, I still wasn’t overly excited.
I guess the main reason though is because, I wasn’t all that popular. I mean sure, I didn’t get bashed or anything but I didn’t exactly have any friends either. I guess it’s because I just wasn’t very talkative, and I cared a bit about my school work. This alone earned me the label of ‘nerd’, but I wore it with a bit of silent pride. It didn’t worry me that I went to the library a fair bit and poured over books of various kinds. Ancient fables, stories of war and aggression, stories depicting the upbringing of empires and there downfall. It kept me enthralled, and I suppose it took my mind off the other minor social concerns I had.
There was nothing I could do to get out of school however so, along with everyone else, I got up early and sighed at the prospect of the year to come.
I was opening my locker as the first warning bell rang to tell students they should make their way to class, and spent a little bit of time placing my books where they belonged. When I closed the locker, I realised that I’d spent a little bit too long organising; the halls were nearly deserted! Rushing a little towards my classroom, I was so preoccupied at the idea of being late, that I had no warning before something large bumped into me and sent me flying to the ground.
There was brief laughter as I, being both confused and disorientated, attempted to sit up. And then someone shouted close by making me flinch, ‘Get back here! I’m not chasing you!’
Looking up, I found out just who had run into me. It was a boy around my age. He held dirty blonde hair which passed down to just above his shoulders; his build was slender poker oyna yet very well-toned, as if he spent most of his time playing some sort of sport, and (my heart fluttered a little at looking at them), handsome green eyes.
There was a moment of silence before the boy smiled and spoke again, ‘Sorry about that dude, are you okay?’
‘Er yeh, yeh I’m fine.’ I answer, my face reddening a little as he extended his hand to help me to my feat. I accepted, feeling the warmth radiating from both his fingertips and his smile in a way I’d never felt before. It was strange, but I was almost transfigured by this guy.
‘My mate ran into me and then ran off, I’ll get him back but.’ The boy laughed, letting go of my hand and indicating what was in his other, ‘It was a bad catch.’
My eyes fell to the rugby ball resting against his side. I was right indeed to think that he played sports.
Finally, I get my act together and decide to ask him a question; one that was burning on my mind because I don’t remember this guy at all, ‘Are you new here?’
‘Yep,’ he answered, ‘me and my friend both transferred because our school didn’t really have a good footy program going, this schools better anyway, its huge!’
‘Yeh I guess it is.’ I said, smiling weakly, ‘What class are you in?’
‘Ah, I don’t know actually.’
The boy started to dig into his shorts pockets for a while before pulling out a crumpled piece of paper.
‘Can I have a look?’ I asked.
When he handed me the timetable, my heart skipped a beat.
‘You’re in my class.’ I said, ‘I’ll show you were it is.’
‘Sweet, thanks man.’ He said, smiling again, ‘I’m Noah by the way.’
‘Corey.’ I responded, as we set off down the hall.
Several minutes passed in which we walked to class, talking about different things such as Noah’s old school, the local sports team (which I didn’t have much interest in but knew it existed) and where the best place might be to sit at lunch. All the while, I couldn’t stop thinking about what was happening. Someone was talking to me; as in having a full blown conversation. It was simply unheard of, especially for someone as sporty and good looking as Noah!
When we arrived at the classroom, Noah opened the door first and stepped in, gave me a little wave and went off to sit next the guy who must have been his friend. My heart sank a little as he left me to sit on my own near the back of the room.
As the teacher began her lesson, I was left to ponder on what had just happened. It was unlikely that I would befriend Noah, he was simply too ‘cool’. Even glancing over at him then, I found him making friends with a few other footy players and surfers.
I sighed but for some reason, my eyes didn’t leave Noah. His entire image was captivating me to the point that I wanted to simply get up canlı poker oyna and walk over to him. It was like some sort of magic.
I jumped upon hearing my name so abruptly.
Turning my head to the aging teacher, I found her glaring at me. Twenty five sets of eyes found me as the teacher smiled and asked, ‘Could you repeat the question for me?’
Blushing, I said the first thing that came to mind, ‘Obviously not if you’re asking me.’
The whole class sniggered. Turning my head a little, my heart sank as I saw Noah doing much the same as the rest of the class.
If I had thought that the new school year would bring change, I was very wrong. All manner of students from girls to boys continued to ignore me completely as I moved around the school over the next few weeks just as they had always done.
It was some weeks later when I was sitting at lunch time, alone, and depressingly pulled out a book so as to avoid the looks and sometimes taunts of the student that something strange happened.
My time reading was fully interrupted when I looked up and saw Noah approaching.
‘Can I sit down?’ he asked in a quiet voice.
‘Yeh.’ I said back, equally as quiet.
He sat and I glanced at him. He was perfect, truly perfect…from his blond hair to his thighs stretching right up to the hem of his shorts.
‘It was really cool, speaking the way you did to Mr. Whitton the other day.’ Noah blurted out suddenly.
I had the impression that Noah had rehearsed this line many times.
‘Thanks.’ I answered.
Noah began to talk again and as he did, I was instantly reminded of the rather sweet boy that had bumped into me a few weeks prior rather than the surly, immature guy that I had since seen. In fact, me and Noah found ourselves sitting and talked for the rest of lunch about where we lived and what we liked to do on the weekends, things of that nature.
When the bell signalled, Noah stood up before me.
‘All right, I’ll see you.’
As Noah walked away, I was left feeling crestfallen.
We were both in the same class after all and we could have walked there together but…no, obviously not.
When I reached the classroom, I saw that Noah was standing around with his usual friends. And now I understood why Noah had run away from me. It was because the people who Noah hung around with were the same people who had bullied me and in fact, many others as well for years. And there he was, standing with them and laughing and acting nothing short of childish once more.
Was Noah embarrassed to be seen talking to me?
Knowing the answer all to well, I sighed. If Noah wanted a friendship with me then he would have to pick either one or the other and somehow, I didn’t really think that Noah would choose me over his friends.
The internet casino door slammed shut, announcing my return home. As I did so, I proceeded to cross into the hallway and up the stairs, towards my bedroom.
It would be foolish for me really to expect one of my parents to greet me. Once upon a time they would have and I know because they did so actively. Yet now they were probably drunk or something to that effect. I didn’t know and didn’t really care to be honest. I had turned 18 last month and since then, the prospect of leaving home was more than welcoming. In fact if there was a way I could possibly do so, I would. Considering though that I didn’t have a job anymore or any relatives or friends to help me, it would probably be stupid to leave. No, for now, my and my parents kind of silent co-existance was probably for the best.
I slumped onto my bed and lay thinking for a while and after what seemed to be an hour, decided that it was best to attempt to get the one thing out of my mind and pick up a book. However, today the book was not as enjoyable as it might have been.
There was something that simply couldn’t escape my mind and that was the sports lesson of that day in which I had seen Noah in his short, footy shorts while the guys had all played shirts against skins soccer. Noah was on the shirtless team.
The sight was so clear in my mind, so real that it wasn’t long before something of a tent had formed in my shorts.
I turned onto my back and glanced to check my door was closed. Looking down, I saw the sight that I knew all too well. The tent was throbbing more than it usually did though, which excited me more.
I gave a slight shiver as I reached down and put my hand under the waistband to grip my hard dick. I began to run my fingers gently across it and started rubbing the palm of my hand around the knob in a circular motion.
I shivered again and pulled my shorts down to my knees. After freeing them, I grabbed my balls with my left hand fondled them around while my right hand ran up and down my shaft, steadily getting faster and faster. My foreskin was being brought up over the tip of my knob and pulled back down at an alarming rate.
All the while, I could see vividly in my minds eye Noah, standing before me. Noah’s sweaty hair and chest were fast in motion as Noah moved forward and back fucking me tight in the ass. I could feel my fingers running into my asshole, but in my mind I saw Noahs dick ploughing backwards and forwards: in and out. Noah moaned as I moaned and I knew Noah must be close to his climax as well. And then, with a final few flings of my hand over my knob, Noah reached his desired point and spurted cum straight into my clenching ass. As Noah did so, I cried out loudly. My hips rolled and my ass left the bed as cum spurted from my dick not once, twice but four times reaching right up to my nipples.
I breathed heavily and laid back playing with my scares, sweaty pubes and balls for some time. Even though I opened my mind, my thoughts did not leave that one guy.
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