How I lost my virginity to an older man, Pt. 5

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How I lost my virginity to an older man, Pt. 5When we arrived at his house, he got a couple of sodas and we sat on the couch.He said, “First, I don’t want you to feel embarrassed or ashamed of anything. Please believe me when I tell you that I am a very non judgmental person. There is probably nothing you can tell me that will be a shock. I hope you have the confidence in me to speak openly. Ask me anything you like.”i was very nervous and shyly said, “i’m really confused about yesterday. i don’t understand what happened.” i opened my mouth, but it was hard to get the words out. Eventually, i said, angrily, “i’m NOT gay… i know i’m not.”He said, “Take it easy Terry, we’re just talking.”He waited a minute, kastamonu escort then said, “I hear what you are saying, but why do you say you can’t be gay? Why do you say that so vehemently?”i couldn’t answer.“Let me ask you this, have you been with girls before?”“Yes.” i told him i fooled around with a girl a few times the past summer.He said, “Okay. Why don’t you tell me what you did with her?”“We kissed and i fingered her and she gave me a blowjob.”“Did you enjoy it.”“Yes. It was great.”“Okay. So you didn’t actually have intercourse with her?”“No.”“Okay. Let me ask you about yesterday, okay? I’m just trying to help you understand what happened and maybe why. Why do you think you didn’t kastamonu escort bayan stop what we were doing? Do you have any idea?”A few minutes passed, but i didn’t answer. i was still upset, and was trying to calm down.“Okay, that’s okay.” He paused as if he were thinking and then said, “Let me ask you this then. Yesterday, it seemed to me, and I might be completely wrong about this so don’t get upset, but it seemed to me that before you made me cum, and again, I’m very sorry about that, it seemed as if you were enjoying it. Now be honest with me, and with yourself. Could that possibly be true? Think about it before you answer.”i thought about what he asked, honestly wondering if what escort kastamonu he was asking could possibly be true. Chaotic thoughts were quickly running through my mind. i was hard, but we were watching porn. What about last night, i was definitely more attracted to videos where guys with large penises were getting blowjobs. And why was i unable to stop myself from sneaking peaks at his penis yesterday? Was it just curiosity because i had never seen a man’s penis before, or was it something else? When he started to cum, why didn’t i pull away rather than let him cum in my mouth? That girl last summer let me do that, so i knew what was going to happen… i could tell when he started so i could have stopped it. Whydidn’t i? Why did i leave so quickly? Was it because of the shame of letting it happen or was i just unwilling to let myself admit i enjoyed it? The more i thought, the more mixed up i became.i was stunned to think there could be some truth in what asked.

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