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Andy waited on the line and noticed that the music was an adaptation of a song from a musical that satirized a certain German dictator. When his younger sister finally got on the line she promptly told him that she couldn’t talk at that moment. Great. He only called because her text said it was important and it turned out she had wasted his time. It was things likes this that were the reason he didn’t really have anything to do with his family anymore.
Well, that wasn’t true. He had another reason, a very secret reason.
What should someone do if they find out they have dyslexia? Should they let it hold them back? No. You work through it and find a way around it. What should one do if they find out they have asthma? Should that be a reason to never play sports? No. You get an inhaler and you don’t let it hold you back. Andy had even read the story of a man who lived his entire life hiding the fact that he had schizophrenia. He would force himself to ignore his paranoia and refused to talk to the various hallucinations that tried to converse with him. He lived his entire life without anyone figuring out that he was crazy and only after he retired did he even tell his wife.
Andy was in a similar situation. There were many days he thought he must be crazy. He had two sisters and when he was a teenager he found that he was very attracted to the younger one, Wendy. For a long time she dominated his thoughts and was part of every sexual fantasy he had. He tried to tell his older sister, Bella, how he felt about Wendy once but she didn’t understand and then there were hard feelings between them.
When he left for college he found himself comparing every woman he dated to his younger sister. He knew it was wrong. He knew his family and society as a whole would never accept this. Even he did not accept it. He wished again and again that those feelings would just go away. But they didn’t go away. Even when he remembered that disgusted look on Bella’s face when she realized what he might be suggesting. Even when he remembered how Bella had treated him afterwards. Even when he remembered Bella’s words that cut so deep. Those feelings would just never go away.
So Andy decided to manage the problem. He had a wire crossed some place but that was no reason he couldn’t live a perfectly normal and productive life. In his mind he compared it to being in love with a married woman, famous woman, or otherwise unavailable or unattainable woman. He’d just have to treat Wendy like that.
In practice that wasn’t really how it went down. As a junior in college he skipped going home for the holidays. Then that summer he couldn’t go see his parents because he was going overseas for a couple of months. Then as a senior he went to with his girlfriend to spend the holidays with her family. He got a part in a film right out of college and was already booked for plays in London and New York when that finished. Phone calls became fewer and fewer and eventually his family started to see him as a stranger they only saw once a year at most.
Now Andy was 26 and for the most part could lead a normal life. Girlfriends came and went as it goes with everyone. No one would guess that deep down he had a secret desire. That desire never really went away but it was much cooler now then it was in the past. He often tried to convince himself that he didn’t go home because he was angry and holding a grudge but in those moments when he allowed himself to be honest, he knew the real reason.
Then he got this text message from Wendy. She had wanted him to call and said it was important. So he called, was put on hold, and waited. Then she couldn’t talk so he was a bit annoyed. When she texted him again asking to call he just didn’t call. Then the texts started coming faster and faster. So Andy texted back that she should just call him.
That seemed to end it for a while. It was all the way at the end of the day and Andy was making his way out of the theater after rehearsal and back to his car when his phone rang.
“Yeah, Wendy. What’s up?”
“Can you talk?”
“So I take it you haven’t understood the pops and clicks I’ve been making up until now.”
“I mean is now a good time?”
“Are you calling to offer me money?”
“Well, there’s never a bad time to offer someone money.”
“I wanted to ask you a favor.”
“Oh, you want something from me! Ok.”
“I need a date.”
“That doesn’t sound like anything I can help you with.”
“I know but just hear me out. There’s this big company gala that I have to go to and I need a date.”
“So go get a date.”
“But I sort of painted myself into a corner. I need a date who will say they’ve been dating me for a while.”
“I sort of lied and told everyone at my office that I had this totally amazing boyfriend.”
“So go get a totally amazing boyfriend. Or just pick up some guy and get him to play along.”
“I thought of that but it just seems too risky. Can you please just drive down and pretend to be my kartal escort boyfriend for a night?”
“You want me to do it?”
“Yeah. This is too important to trust with anyone else.”
“And you’re the one who’s the actor in the family.”
“I can’t pretend to be your boyfriend.”
“Well, because … I’m your brother. Duh.”
“Nobody here knows that.”
“It would be weird. What if I had to kiss you?”
“It’s a formal party. Just kiss me on the cheek and I think it’s good enough.”
“What if someone notices that we look the same?”
“Look the same? Andy, you have brown hair and green eyes, we look nothing alike.”
“The cheekbones. The nose.”
“Nobody’s going to notice that.”
“They might. And for your information my eyes are hazel.”
“Is that what they call it when one side doesn’t match the other?”
“Actually … You know what. No. I’ll help you find a date but I’m not going with you.”
“Please. Pretty please. I’ll be nice. I swear. You’ll have fun.”
“Just tell everyone at the party that your boyfriend is busy.”
“There’s no time.”
“What do you mean there’s no time? When’s the party?”
“You expected to just call me up and get me to go all the way there in just two days?”
“I know it’s short notice.”
“I’ll say. I could have plans already. You don’t know.”
“I know. I know. And I’m really sorry I have to ask but you’re my only hope.”
“Relax. Your boss isn’t going to think any less of you if you don’t show up with a boyfriend to a party.”
“Oh, I think he might.”
“He won’t. If he has any integrity he won’t.”
“See, there’s more to it than just a party.”
“I was dating a guy in the office and the company has a rule against that …”
“So you need to show up with a boyfriend so you won’t get fired.”
“Something like that. The thing that really sucks is that we had already broken up but it wasn’t like a clean break up and Mitch started pulling these stunts at work and somebody noticed and narced on us.”
“And Mitch is?”
“The guy I was dating.”
“I figured that much. He’s your boss? Co-worker?”
“Manager. He isn’t directly my boss but it’s complicated.”
“Right. Because of course it’s complicated.”
“So please. If I lose my job I don’t know what I’ll do.”
“Simple. You go get another one. I do it all the time.”
“Easy for you to say. I worked hard to get this one and this could totally ruin my reputation…”
“Alright. Alright. I’ll do it.”
“What time is the party?”
Andy arrived at his sister’s house and was determined to keep his cool. Andy waited for his sister to finish getting ready and told himself that this would just be him taking his sister, SISTER, to a party. When she came out she looked absolutely beautiful. She walked over to him and smiled.
“How do I look?”
Andy looked at her. She was so much older than the last time he’d seen her. In fact, she looked a lot like …
Those old feelings, so long kept in check with distance were now trying to confuse him. What if she wasn’t really his sister? That was an idiotic idea. Of course she was his sister. They had the same parents. Same mother. Same father. But Andy looked so different from everyone else. Yeah, but it wasn’t that different. If not for a small genetic mutation, which isn’t that rare in the first place, he’d look just like everyone else. Eyes with three colors and skin that was stained yellow did not mean he was adopted.
“Stunning.” he said.
“Thank you.” she said and she hugged him.
She was so pretty tonight. He remembered the feelings he had when he went to prom. He remembered how it felt like he was falling in love. What was her name? Samantha. Andy had liked her a lot. He remembered how it felt to kiss her in the back of a limo with his tux and her prom dress in the way of what they both felt like they really wanted to do. Those feelings all died when the following Monday came. But here he was with Wendy in his arms. He felt like he wanted to kiss her. He felt like he wanted to fall into a heap on the floor with her. He just felt so much in love with her.
It wasn’t real. Of course it wasn’t real. This was not how he was supposed to feel for Wendy. He couldn’t believe this. He had to fight against it. She was his sister. She was his sister. He repeated that in his head. Why was this happening to him?
There was one good thing about all this. Holding her like this was making him feel very nice. He thought about that for a moment and figured he’d be ok with it. He didn’t want to be ok with it but it didn’t feel so wrong to just hold her. How long had it been since he felt this way? Had any girl really made his feel this way?
There were times when Andy wondered if Wendy felt the same way about him. Of course she didn’t. And even if she did he still couldn’t act on what was going on inside of him. Then again, maltepe escort bayan it was easy not to act on it since he knew she didn’t feel for him what he felt for her. But if she did, then he’d really be tempted. He’d never give in. He knew that or at least he told himself that. But it probably would feel really nice if he did.
The party with hundreds of people in attendance had been underway for about an hour before anyone even noticed Andy. He’d been keeping a low profile and deliberately avoided his sister. The two people he had been introduced to didn’t really pay much attention to him. But now Andy was in conversation with someone and he didn’t seem to have an easy way to get out of it.
“So, you’re Wendy’s guy?”
“Nice to meet you.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name.”
The other man waited for Andy to ask a question or keep talking but Andy didn’t oblige.
“So, Ernest. What do you do?”
“I’m a photographer.”
“Interesting. Would I have seen any of your work?”
“Hard to tell.”
“And … why’s that?”
“Have you ever eaten in a restaurant in Korea?”
“Uh … no.”
“I mostly do food photography for menus in Asian countries.”
“Right. Ok. That’s very interesting. Anyways. Nice to meet you.”
Andy just nodded his head. That was one more person who would think he was way too boring to talk to. He just really hoped no one notice that he looked a lot like a certain actor who played supporting roles in film. Just as the man called Mitch was leaving another man came up.
“Mr. Hemingway. Wendy’s told me all about you. How do you do?”
Andy put his hand out to shake hands and as he did Mitch suddenly took another interest in Andy.
“Wait. Your name is Ernest Hemingway?”
“Yes, and I know where you’re going with this so you can just save your breath. I have this exact conversation fifty or sixty times a years. I am so sick of hearing it. You’re going to mention that it’s the same name as some dead writer guy to which I’ll say, duh, I know. Then someone will mention that they read the guy’s boring ass book, which somehow has something to do with me even though I didn’t write it. Then someone will ask me if I read the book to which I’ll say that I couldn’t finish the thing because it was utter garbage. Then someone will mention that the writer guy killed himself and just how much it was a shame. I usually don’t say it out loud but deep down I think I know why the guy offed himself. I’d probably commit suicide myself if my name was on such a complete piece of trash. Then someone will ask me if I’ve ever tried writing and I answer that; yes I have and my fanfiction is a thousand times better than the vomit that other guy put out. Someone then might notice that I’m really annoyed about this name thing and suggest that if it makes me so upset why don’t I just change my name. I respond to this by pointing out the fact that it’s MY NAME. I’m alive. He’s dead. It’s MY NAME now. MY. NAME. Ok. Now does anyone have a problem with that?”
They all looked at him with near disbelief for a moment. Mitch apologized and said he didn’t mean to offend. Andy had played it up just perfect and they totally believed him when he said he needed to step out for a moment to cool off. The funny part was that Andy actually liked Hemingway’s book.
Andy found a nice secluded spot where he could hopefully wait out the night with no more conversation. His hopes were dashed when someone sneaked up behind him. Luckily for Andy, it was his sister.
“You’ve really made yourself the talk of the party.”
“I’m glad you approve.”
“I thought I heard you yelling at someone. What happened?”
“Some idiot named Mitch forgot to use ‘fewer’ with a countable noun and used ‘less’ instead.”
“That’s how you know that all this money we’re putting into education isn’t doing a damn thing. That guy probably went to college and everything and is still going around saying nonsense like ‘less people’ instead of ‘fewer people’. I tell you, it’s enough to make me want to punch him in the mouth.”
“That’s not what really happened, is it?”
“Honestly. I don’t remember.”
She smiled. “Thank you for doing this for me.” she said as he put her arms around him and leaned in close.
The change in his mental state was instant. He felt like a long abused person who finally got a hug for the first time in their life or a wound that was finally being soothed. He had to keep that feeling from bubbling up and expressing itself where others could see but he felt like he just wanted to hug her until the end of time. He felt like he wanted to cry. Why did she have such an effect on him? Why did he have to be this way?
He wanted to kiss her. He started rationalizing it in his head. If he kissed her then it was just because he was playing a part. She asked him to play a part and he was an actor. He licked his lips. No. He couldn’t do that. He had to stop himself. He felt escort pendik his erection trying to emerge from his slacks. Ok, sure kissing was bad but it wasn’t nearly as bad as what he could do with that.
He had to keep himself under control. She had to let go. She had to go away. He could never see her again. He’d have to move to another country and never call anyone in his family again.
The hug ended and his sister began to pull away. Andy had made it. He hadn’t given in. It was over. Then he started to feel a deep loss inside. He had missed his chance.
No. He couldn’t let her get away.
No. He had to stop himself.
He felt like he wanted to scream. He felt like he wanted to be tied down and have his free will taken away from him. Every muscle in his body had to lock into place to keep him from shaking.
As his sister turned away from him he grabbed her wrist, spun her to face him, and then he kissed her. She was surprised at first but she was helpless in his grip. She gave in to the kiss and if Andy had been able to tell he might have described what she did as swoon.
“Hello?” said a voice that sounded like it was approaching them. Andy’s sister pulled away and hid her face for just a moment and then turned to the man. “Trying to get a moment alone I see.”
“Mr. Collins, this is Ernest.”
“Yes. We’ve had the pleasure. I was wondering if you two would like to join me for a bit of a small get together after the party.”
“We’d be happy to.” said Wendy.
“Great. I’ll get back to the others. And Ernest, don’t make yourself a stranger.”
As soon as the man left Wendy said “Quick thinking there.” but then she could see that Andy was not happy. “What?” she asked.
“I agreed to do a party. Why’d you put me on the hook for more?”
“He’s my boss.”
“The one you were dating?”
“No. My real boss. This is great.”
“How is this great?”
“Just play along a bit longer. Please. I’ll find a way to make it up to you.”
Andy thought of a very good way she could make it up to him but she’d never agree to it.
Wendy seemed very happy to be invited to the after party. She was holding Andy’s hand unaware of the effect it had on him and telling him things in his ear about how much this will help her career. She was also very happy that Mitch didn’t get an invite.
The after party was in a small lounge area. Everyone was asked to sit. There were about twenty people in the room. Mr. Collins moved close to Wendy to explain what was going to happen.
“Now, listen. Ms. Evens tends to let these things get out of hand. If you happen to see something or someone doing something that you object to, just don’t freak out. No one has to do anything they don’t want to.”
“What sort of things usually go on?” Andy asked.
“It’s no secret that the company president likes other women. She likes lots of other women. Personally, I think she’s got a bit of an approval complex.”
“Ok. But what sort of things are actually going to happen?”
“Half the time we just sit and chat with drinks served by a scantly clad waitress.”
“And the other half?”
“In front of everyone?”
“She’s not shy about it. No.”
“Wow.” Wendy said. “I never would have guessed.”
“Never?” her boss asked.
“I mean, I knew she was … that way but I had no idea this was going to be a sex party.”
“Well, just keep the sex talk down and try not to be startled or mention any body parts revealed by wardrobe malfunctions and we might be fine. There’s a good chance we’ll just talk and Ms. Evens is actually very knowledgeable.”
The first half hour of the after party went smoothly enough. There was chatting, and then drinking, and then the karaoke machine came out. It was a very relaxed environment and Andy found himself looking at Wendy like he never thought he’d look at her before. He looked at her cleavage and then let his eyes trace the line of her leg from the floor all the way up.
It was Wendy’s turn to sing when someone sat next to Andy and addressed him.
“Stephanie Evans.” she introduced herself.
“I can see you love that woman very much, but you hold back. Something is not right.”
“We’ve had our difficulties recently.”
“My darling you tell me all about it.”
“See, I was, … I was going to propose but …”
“I was shopping for a ring when I found out about something.”
“She betrayed your trust?”
“Not exactly but something.”
“But you still love her so much. I can see it.”
“I just don’t know what to do.”
“If you love her, forgive her.”
“Then get that ring and propose. What is stopping you?”
“I don’t know if she’ll say yes.”
“If you already know the answer, why ask the question? Tell her how you feel and see what she will say. We all have to take a chance and ask.”
“She doesn’t feel the same way.”
“So certain are you?”
“She’d never … I just know.”
“That just means you have to convince her.”
“I look in your eyes and I see a man who loves a woman with a passion beyond all telling. There has to be a way. If there is no hope for you then what does that say for the rest of us?”
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